20231120 内在功课 | Monday Coffee

Focus on a few fundamentals can create a massive change in your life, number one make your healing personal transformation and well-being top priorities number two refrain from harming yourself or others three create mental space for gratitude four be kind and generous to others.
Yung Pueblo

专注于一些基本原则可以在你的生活中产生巨大的改变：第一，让你的疗愈、个人转变和幸福成为首要任务；第二，避免伤害自己或他人；第三，为感恩创造心灵空间；第四，对他人善良和慷慨。

这个世界最终只是我们与我们内在的投影。

Try to say more yes to yourself and more no to others.

因此，不要让我们的选择和决定受到任何外界的影响。不必告诉别人我们想做的事情，也无需征求他人的建议，只需直接去实施。告诉别人，别人的犹豫会影响你。每个人都只对自己负责，没有别人对我们负责，我们也不需要对其他任何人负责。

Impatience with action, patience with results. Naval Ravikant

当我们想要做某事时，只需考虑我们为什么想要。例如，对财富的渴望，我们可以问自己为什么？也许是因为财富能带来自由，或者是因为我们缺乏安全感。当我们执着于追求外表美丽的时候，也可以问问自己为什么？因为内心对被欣赏被爱的渴望？这样可以挖掘出内心真正的需求，这才是我们需要追求的根本。

Hell yeah or no - It's okay to say no. If someone asks me to do something and I'm not like "hell yeah" then my default position is to say "nope, I'm not gonna do this". Ali Abdaal

我们在别人的生活中没有我们想象得那么重要。当我们要设定自己的边界并对工作或他人的请求说“不”时，直接礼貌地拒绝即可。我们甚至无需解释为什么要这样做，因为别人很难真正设身处地地理解你。

如果我们答应了自己并不真正想要做的事情，不仅会牺牲自己的需求和欲望，还会向外界传达一个信号，表明我们愿意放弃或妥协自己真正想要的东西或生活。这可能导致更多不想要的情况进入我们的生活。

相反，当我们坚定地对不适合自己的事情说“不”时，我们尊重了自己的需求和愿望，并向外界传达了一个明确的信息。这有助于吸引更多积极的经验。

因此，通过说“不”，设定清晰的边界并表达我们的需求和愿望非常重要，这将帮助我们与真实的自我保持一致。

Inner work refers to the process of self-reflection, self-awareness, and personal growth. It involves exploring and understanding your thoughts, beliefs, emotions, patterns, and behaviors to create positive change and alignment within yourself. Inner work is about delving deep into your inner landscape, uncovering any limiting beliefs or unresolved emotions, and transforming them into more empowering and aligned perspectives.

内在功课（inner work）是指自我反思、自我觉察和个人成长的过程。它涉及探索和理解我们自己的思维、信念、情绪、模式和行为，以在内心创造积极的变化和一致性。我们深入挖掘内在世界，揭示潜藏在内心的限制性信念或未解决的情绪，并通过冥想、正念、写日记等方法，疗愈自己，并将其转化为赋予我们力量并与我们内心协调的观念。最终帮助我们找到真正的喜悦和自由。

疗愈我们的内在，自我关怀（self-care）是我们生活中的首要任务。因为如果我们不做内在功课，过去的伤痛、行为模式和限制性信念将永远困扰我们。我们会不断重复自己的应激反应，被困在限制性思维中。

正如Yung Pueblo在播客节目The School of Greatness中所分享的，在生命中发生的事件来去匆匆，但有些事情却一直停留，它们在我们的记忆中塑造了我们对世界的认知（无论是积极还是消极），影响我们对事件的解释和判断，以及我们的反应。如果我们不能解决过去的伤痛，生命还会重复这道课题，我们将不断经历情绪的波动，直到我们消解它、跨越它。

念头，是一种头脑的惯性。分析痛苦的经过，只是把苦的能量在脑海不断重复，造出更顽强的习气回路。与其不断投入苦的能量、强化痛苦的路径，不如透过感恩让心对自己慈爱柔软，建立新的爱的回路，融化受伤的心。
杨定一

过去，当面对生活中发生的事情时，我脑海中的台词总是“这个人、这件事让我感到负面情绪”，但事实上，“我”让这件事对我的情绪产生了影响。当我感受到负面情绪时，我放弃了自己对那个人、那个瞬间、那件事的控制权。

而现在，当我遇到类似情况时，我会努力尽快意识到自己的情绪，并通过各种方法来化解它。同时，我也会将其视为宇宙帮助我提升自我觉察的机会。

How often have you heard yourself or others say:

你是否经常听到自己或他人说：

" She really made me angry."

“她真的让我生气了。”

"He really upset me."

“他真的让我很不爽。”

" I felt sick when I heard about it. "

“当我听到这件事时，我感到恶心。”

" They really depress me."

“他们真的让我很沮丧。”

In truth, no one else can cause you to feel bad. You actually cause these feelings yourself. You will control your own feelings when you have developed complete control of your own Thinking or Conscious Mind.

事实上，没有其他人能让你感到难过。这些感觉其实是你自己造成的。当你完全控制自己的思维或意识时，你就能控制自己的感觉。

杨定一博士在《呼吸，为了疗愈》中提到，与其让创伤和压力不断累积，不如当下就消化它。消化它的方法，不是一一去分析、去数算、去拆解带来痛苦的事件；相反地，是在当下感谢自己──感恩自己承受了一切，感恩自己可以难过、可以流泪，感恩自己流完泪后还可以继续走下去，感恩自己得以学习、得以成长、活出智慧与勇气。

而我的方法是当觉察到自己负面情绪的时候就和flowgpt https://flowgpt.com/p/abraham-hicks-hot-seat-1 对话，同时每天留出一点时间做情绪自检。

daily check-in prompts 1
Start and end each workday with a daily check-in. Share your body status, emotions, and achievements/accomplishments.

Suggestions:

Emphasize the importance of self-care by asking about physical well-being, such as "How is your body feeling today? Any pain or discomfort?"

Encourage reflection on emotional well-being by asking about feelings, such as "What emotions are you experiencing right now? How are they influencing your work?"

Motivate individuals to share their achievements or accomplishments by asking, "What is one thing you accomplished today that you're proud of?"

Questions:

Are there any specific details or prompts you would like to include for the body status section?

Do you have any preferences for the language used to describe emotions?

Should the achievement/accomplishment section be focused on work-related tasks or can it include personal achievements as well?

daily check-in prompts 2
Please assess my current emotional status and select one or more emotions from the provided list: happiness, sadness, anger, fear, surprise, disgust, love, excitement, anxiety, guilt, shame, jealousy, pride, gratitude, contentment, amusement, hope, relief, empathy, compassion.

Do I feel any tension in my body? What is the cause of these emotions or any related memories? Are there any recent events or triggers that might have contributed to these emotions? Additionally, help me address any limiting beliefs that may be contributing to these emotions. Finally, please let me know which areas of my life (health, wealth, relationships, career) I feel stuck in and want to improve.

Suggestions:
Include a question about the intensity of the emotions to gauge their impact on the individual. Ask for specific examples of limiting beliefs that may be contributing to the emotions. Inquire about any support systems or resources the individual has in place to help them improve in the identified areas of life.

Questions:
How would you rate the intensity of these emotions on a scale of 1 to 10?
Can you provide specific examples of limiting beliefs that you think may be contributing to these emotions?
Do you have any support systems or resources in place that can help you improve in the identified areas of life?

当然，每个人的内在成长道路都是独一无二的，需要我们自己去判断哪些途径对自己更有效。相比于养成健身的习惯和工作习惯，探索内在功课对我而言更为困难，因为很难量化其进展。但它值得我们花时间努力去追求，因为只要我们投入其中，就会即刻感受到我们世界的正向转变。

最后，感谢给我赞赏和评论的朋友们，我觉得被你们点亮了！

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